Plastic body, hollow head, hate rhetoric -- it's all there, it's Ann Coulter in doll form! The doll, part of the "America's real action heros" line, now joins the ranks of conservative action figure favorites such as Top Gun Bush, Talking Ronald Reagan, and the Donald Rumsfeld "Rummy" doll. Complete with slutty mini skirt and spiked silver heels, the new Anne Coulter doll parrots 5 exclusively recorded patriotic Coulter quotes. My favorite...
"Liberals hate America, they hate flag-wavers, they hate abortion opponents, they hate all religions except Islam, post 9/11. Even Islamic terrorists don't hate America like Liberals do. They don't have the energy. If they had that much energy, they'd have indoor plumbing by now."
Don't forget those extra batteries!
This just in -- Whitehouse staff member, Jimmy Orr, has accepted blame for deliberately misleading the American people.
It was on the official Whitehouse website where the controversy began – Orr had repeatedly referred to Barney the dogs chew toy as a soccer ball. It was only after a thorough investigation, the shocking truth was revealed -- Presidents dog was not playing with a soccer ball in the Christmas 2003 “Barney and Spot's Winter Wonderland” video, it was actually a volleyball.
"I blame myself", says Whitehouse Internet News Director, Jimmy Orr. Though a resignation has not been ordered, there is speculation as to whether or not the Whitehouse Director will be able to effectively carry out his job in light of the recent scandal.
Bush administration critics are calling for "heads to roll" over Ballgate, but for me satisfaction comes from just hearing a Whitehouse employee admit fault.
With the Democratic National Convention coming to town, citizens looking to exercise their right to speak freely might be surprised to learn, they’ll be doing it from a cage.
While Boston Officials are welcoming the DNC protesters, it’s apparent they’ve also exhausted the cities barbed wire supply. The “Free Speech Zone”, an amalgamation of Jersey barriers, lattice fencing, barbed wire and netting, is by all outward appearances, a large cage.
City officials, concerned of a possible terrorist attack during the Democratic National Convention, are asking DNC attendees to stay vigilant and under no circumstances should they feed the protesters as they pass the free speech cage.
Today’s the day -- at 11:30am, the 9/11 Commission will release their final report. For an immediate fix, visit the official Commission website on or after 11:30am, as the full report will be posted then. The findings will be available in bookstores nationwide by various publishers, but there's also a limited printing of GPO (Government Printing Office) copies available for $13 a piece. You can pre-order an official version, as I [book snob] did, from the GPO website.
There's been much speculation in recent weeks regarding the possibility of Bush dropping Cheney from the 2004 ticket. While there's a strong constituency looking forward to four more years of Bush, there's a percentage of those who would rather see Cheney dropped in favor of a more likeable character.
Would that character be Dick Gephardt? Of course not, but who wouldn't like to see the two of them holding hands, skipping down the campaign trail? McCain seems like a logical pick, but I think he'd sooner drown than get on the sinking ship.
The candidate would have to stand up to John Edwards’s overall likeability and dare we say it – cuteness. So, who comes to mind? Tom Ridge? He's too aggressive. John Ashcroft? He's unpleasant to look at. Ralph Nader? He's too… well, isn't he already campaigning for Bush? Here's an idea -- how about Hillary Clinton? As Marc Perkel predicted in a humorous rant -- this may be Bush's sole chance of re-election.
So when Cheney feigns a heart attack, the only reason he'd drop out, who do you suppose will step in? McCain? Hillary? Powell? All unlikely candidates, but perhaps the most incredible, is the one in Bush’s head -- the Pet Goat. Now that's a cute and likeable character.
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